http://www.bettertoeflscores.com Michael Buckhoff, founder of the 7 Step System to Pass the TOEFL iBT, reads, evaluates, and scores a TOEFL iBT practice essay written by one of his S.T.E.A.L.T.H. students:
Hi Michael,
Can you please evaluate my essay.
Thank you
Q: Some people prefer to spend their free time outdoor. Other people prefer to spend their leisure time indoors. Would you prefer to be outside or would you prefer to be inside for your leisure activities? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.
Although we can't always spend our time outside, because of the weather conditions, I personally prefer to spend more of my leisure time outside. I have luck because I can train capoeira inside and outside, but, whenever I can, I'm training capoeira outside. I love to train with my friends outside because it is better to be in the fresh air and under the sun. Another reason why it is better to be outside is because we don't have to spend our money at a sports hall; we just have to find an empty space outside.
First of all, I love spending my free time outside, especially when training capoeira. After a long day at the university or at work, there is nothing better than to spend time in the fresh air with my friends doing what I love. I don't feel that same good energy while we are training in a sports hall. There is never enough fresh air, and after 30 minutes of training we can't breathe. In addition to that, our sports hall is very small because there is not enough space for everyone, so lots of people are not training.
Secondly, even though our sports hall is very small, we have to pay a lot of money for that hall. When we are outside, we just need to find some empty space at a playground, forest or sandy beach. When we are outside, we can save a lot of money, and, with that money that we would have spent for a sports hall, we can buy, for example, some instruments for capoeira or going on some excursion. While we are outside, the energy is always much better because more people are training.
In conclusion, training outside has more advantages than training inside. I can spend more quality time with all my friends in my group, and we can all save more money for something that we need more.
